Films We Never Got to Review

MINOR REGRETS AT THE END OF A BLOG

When this blog was just beginning, my friend, Tim Stafford, told me he didn't think the blog go last very long. "After all," he asked, "how many movies are there about churches and pastors?"

It's seven years later, and we've looked at a different film every week. There were a few weeks we ran a repeat, but there were quite a few weeks when we discussed more than one movie. That means we’ve looked at more than 350 films, and we still haven’t run out of films to review. I have a list with nearly 300 potential films, and assuming churches keep showing up in new movies -- I think I already have enough to write about for another seven years. But I'm tired and ready to move on to other projects.

You have to pull the plug sometime, but nonetheless, I regret not having a chance to review some great films that had interesting things to say about faith. Some of the films on this list are pretty awful, but still have interesting things to write about. 

Some of the movies on this list are ones I haven't seen, but they might have interesting things to say. 
There are also films that deal with topics that we rarely touched on.

So these are twelve of the films I most regret not getting around to writing about.

12) Fiddler on the Roof (1971)

I've seen this film more than once, and I like it very much. We've looked at musicals (Sound of Music, Cabin in the Sky, Sister Act) but Fiddler would have been the first musical featuring Eastern Orthodox clergy. There haven’t been many films featuring Orthodox clergy -- the only one I can think of is the Mel Brooks comedy, The Twelve Chairs. I could also have written about Andrei Rublev, a painter of icons used for Orthodox worship, or Beyond the Hills about a Romanian Orthodox Covent, but really, I just wish I'd taken the opportunity to drag the priests in Fiddler over the coals for the way they treated Tevye. 

11) The Quick and the Dead (1995) 

I really enjoyed this Sam Rami western, and I would have liked to write about Russell Crowe’s haunted pastor with a history as a desperado. I would have been happy to have an excuse to watch this again. Most of the westerns I’ve written about haven’t been good westerns (we did get to watch the classic High Noon, but most have been along the lines of The Deadly Companions and God’s Gun). It might have also been fun to get to Charleton Heston’s Will Penny in which Donald Pleasence plays a very creepy, evil preacher.

10) The Exorcist 2: The Heretic (1977) 

It really is a shame I couldn't write about this film, since we reviewed the clergy in the original Exorcist. I have read about this film for a long time, starting with Michael Medved’s Golden Turkey Awards (a salute to bad films), but I’ve never seen it. It really is a shame I couldn’t get to Exorcist 2, since we did review the original Exorcist as well as the second sequel. The Heretic stars Richard Burton in a performance legendary for hamminess. Instead, I've settled for the hammy Burton performances in The Sandpiper and The Robe.(FWIW, another bad film I didn’t write about was God’s Not Dead Part IV: We the People. I watched it in the theater, but never got around to writing about it, though we featured the first three God's Not Dead movies.)

9) Lady Godiva of Coventry (1955) - Please don’t assume it is prurient interests that drew me to curiosity about this film (which I’ve never seen). In all the pictures of Maureen O’Hara as the historical streaker, she seems to be surrounded by nuns. All right. I am curious how the filmmakers handled the nudity in studio days with the Hays Code in full effect. (The Song of Bernadette is another faith-centered story from the golden age of Hollywood. It was quite acclaimed. I’ve never seen it, but it looks rather stodgy, and that's kept me from watching it.)

8) The Devils (1971) 

In the blog, we've tried not to shy away from films that are critical of churches and clergy or even the Christian faith. As a result, we’ve looked at films by famous critics of religion like Michael Tolkin and Luis Buñuel. This notorious “historical” work by writer/director Ken Russell (from a story by Aldous Huxley) is one I never got around to watching. It's difficult to find an unedited version of this X-rated film in which Oliver Reed played a priest with unorthodox views on faith and sex whose followers included licentious nuns. But it was not to be.

7) Ganja & Hess (1973) 

Arguably, this blog didn't cover enough vampire blaxsploitation films, and this movie would have helped remedy that oversight. Sadly, this film was also difficult to find in its original form. (Fun fact: Duane Jones's only other starring performance is in Night of the Living Dead.) The Church seems to play an important part in the battle against dark forces, so I do need to get around to watching this sometime even if I don’t have anywhere to write about it.

6) The Miracle Woman (1931)

This is yet another tough film to track down, with one of my favorite directors (Frank Capra), and starring one of my favorite actresses (Barbara Stanwyck). I'm baffled to realize that we haven’t featured any films by Capra or Stanwyck. Though I haven't seen this film, in it, Barbara becomes disillusioned with the Church and takes up a career as a fraudulent evangelist. Pre-Hays Code films like this one had much more freedom to be critical of the Church. I will manage to write about this one someday, even without this blog as a vehicle.

5) Dogma (1999) 

I have seen this Kevin Smith satire of the Roman Catholic Church and angels and demons that was condemned by the Church even before it was released. While I have grave reservations about the theology in the film, at times it's quite funny and would have been interesting to write about.

4) Au Hasard Balthazar (1966) 

Robert Bresson was one of France’s greatest directors, and I was able to review his classic, Diary of a Country Priest. This film contains just a little about church and clergy. Others of his work, such as Angels of Sin (about a convent that rehabilitates convicts) or The Trial of Joan of Arc. Au Hasard Balthazar is Bresson’s only film (and perhaps the only film of any kind) that features the baptism of a donkey.

3) Les Miserables (1935, 1952, 1998, 2012, or any of the other versions)

There are many adaptations of this Victor Hugo film, but I didn’t get to any of them. This is too bad, because Bishop Myriel, who cares for Jean Valjean, is one of the best portrayals of clergy in literature and cinema.

2) The Name of the Rose (1986) 

I’ve read Umberto Eco’s novel, but I’ve never seen this adaptation of the book, and it’s hard to track down. It’s a retelling of a Sherlock Holmes story using Franciscan monks in a medieval abbey. It stars Sean Connery as a friar, William of Baskerville. It also stars Christian Slater and we at Movie Churches do love Christian Slater films (the good and the awful.)

1) Amazing Grace (2006) 

I saw this film and like it very much. Directed by Michael Apted, it tells the true story of William Wilberforce and his campaign against England's slave trade. Wilberforce's pastor was John Newton, the former slave trader and author of the hymn “Amazing Grace.” He definitely would have received our highest Movie Churches rating of Four Steeples.

If only I could have gotten to these dozen films. And maybe, St. Benny the Dip. And…

Robin Hood Month Continues with... The Prequel

Robin Hood (2010)

Fans of Robin Hood have an ongoing debate about the hero’s political inclinations. Some point to Robin’s stance against unjust taxation and his work to restore government to how it had been -- clearly showing him to be a conservative who would be right at home in the modern Tea Party. Others claim Robin’s “rob from the rich and give to the poor” actions clearly mark him as a Socialist.

Ridley Scott’s 2010 version of Robin Hood certainly belongs in the latter camp. However, our concern at this blog is religion rather than politics, and this film’s attitude toward the church might be characterized as closer to Communist perspective.

This version of the tale begins in 1199 with Robin Longstride (Russell Crowe) returning from the Crusades in Jerusalem with the army of King Richard the Lionheart. This Robin is a common soldier, an archer, and also a con man who runs a medieval version of Three Card Monte (ball and cups). Warweary and cynical, Robin is outspoken in his criticism of the King and his war crimes. Robin says, “I don’t owe God or any other man service.”

He is thrown in the stocks along with Allan A’Dayle, Will Scarlet, and Little John, but when the King dies while attempting to loot a French castle, Robin and his comrades escape and return to England.

But Robin has one more duty to perform left from his time abroad. He promised the dying Sir Robert Locksley that he would return the Sir Robert’s sword to his father in Nottingham. Robin impersonates Robert to gain access to Sir Walter (Max von Sydow), the dying father. Robin is surprised when he is asked to continue to impersonate Robert, so that the newly crowned King John (Oscar Isaac) will not gain title to Sir Walter’s land.

Robin finds the people of Nottingham are going hungry because the church is confiscating their grain and sending it to the Bishop. Robin meets Maid Marian (Cate Blanchett), who opposes the bishop’s actions, “The church has reaped all we have, I don’t know if the bishop or king is worse.”

Friar Tuck (Mark Addy) has been newly appointed to serve the local church, where the grain is being stored. Only the elderly and children attend services. The Friar says, “I’m moving the grain to York, abiding by the rules.”

Friar Tuck has a profitable hobby as a beekeeper, making mead from the honey. “I keep them (the bees) and they keep me.” When Robin asks the friar where a man can get a drink, Tuck responds, “Have you tried the honey liquor we call mead?” He adds, “I’m not a churchy friar.”

When the Bishop’s men come to collect the grain, Robin blackmails Tuck into giving the grain to him, telling him that otherwise he’ll inform the Bishop about the Friar’s profitable winemaking. Tuck succumbs to the blackmail, and aids Robin in returning the grain to the people of Nottingham.

The major conflict in the film turns out to be quite different than in other Robin Hood films: the French want to invade England. Friar Tuck is actually one of the first to be aware of the invasion, when an expeditionary force of French soldiers steal his barrels of wine.

King John finds he needs the support of all of England to oppose the French, so he promises to change his oppressive policies. And all of England comes together to drive back the French. Not only does Robin join the battle, but Marian does as well, fighting the French on the shore. But after the battle is won, King John reneges on his promises and claims “God made me King,” and says he will take whatever he wants from the people.

The film ends with Robin retreating to Sherwood Forest with his Merrie Men and Women to establish a commune, free from the oppression of the monarchy and the church (though Friar Tuck joins them). A title card reads, “No tax, no tithe, nobody rich, nobody poor, all sharing at nature’s table.” Perhaps we could say Robin is a part of the Green Party. The film ends where most Robin Hood films begin with Robin and his band in hiding.

The Church in this film is a wealth-grabbing institution in competition with the monarchy to steal the most from the people. Even Friar Tuck only does good when blackmailed into doing so. So the church in this Robin Hood earns our lowest rating of One Steeple.

Bonus Robin Hood: I’d like to point out one Robin Hood that is free of the ideological debate about the politics is found in the fantasy/time travel film Time Bandits. In that movie, John Cleese plays a Hood who is just a hood. He robs from the rich and the poor to get stuff. He just has a really good PR agent.